The things they remember

Seth and I were eating breakfast the other day. I was eating some sort of cereal with flakes, and he said he didn't like that kind. He liked the kind with the sugar on them. I said "frosted flakes" and he said "yeah, frosted flakes. We had them in Myrtle Beach in the little boxes". (we got one of those variety packs of cereal).

So years later, he won't remember how we played on the beach (that one day it wasn't raining), or went to the aquarium, or all the other fun stuff. He'll just remember he had cereal in little boxes. Because THAT was the cool part for him.

Consider yourselves warned

It's that time of year again, folks. The holidays are upon us, causing seemingly sane people to be overtaken with holiday spirit to the point that they completely lose their minds. Especially when it comes to holiday decor. So I've come up with some simple guidelines for those that have temporarily taken leave of their senses (if they ever had them) and gone overboard.

1. Pick a theme and go with it. Santa was not present at the birth of Jesus, so if you have a nativity scene, St. Nick should probably sit this year out.
2. Along the same lines, decide on a color scheme and decorate accordingly. I don't want to see red lights in your trees, blue lights in your bushes, then green lights around your house. It doesn't look festive, it looks stupid.
3. Please rethink any figures that are taller than you. Frosty is sort of scary at 10 feet tall. Is scary the look you're going for? I hope not.
4. If your lights can be seen from space, you have too many. Being called Clark Griswold is NOT a compliment.
   
5. Please, PLEASE make sure all your strands are lit. I shouldn't even have to say this.
   
6. If you're going to do blinkers (but I recommend against it due to this very thing), make sure they're all set to blink the same. Not at the same TIME, but having a running blink next to a twinkler...it makes my eye twitch.
7. January 1 is the absolute last day your lights should be lit. NO EXCEPTIONS. The "holidays" don't include Valentine's Day. Or St. Patrick's Day. Or the Fourth of July. There is a special place in hell for people who try to pass off their Christmas lights as patriotism 6 months later.
   

And yes, I AM the Christmas Lights Police. You got a problem with that?

Ok, I need to get on board

Every year, no, every season change actually, I lament the fact that stores put things out for the next season months in advance, and when the season actually arrives (which is hugely variable in Michigan) there is nothing left. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, and try to get the things I need before I actually need them, but it is just not in my nature.

So it snowed last week, right? Up until that very day, we had been having a very nice fall, not cold at all, so I got complacent. Well, even if it had been cold, I probably would have had the same problem. Anyway, on the very day it snowed I packed up the kids and we went to Target to find some hats and mittens that MATCH. Last year Seth went around all winter with unmatching stuff. I'm such a horrible mom. Nothing at Target, but luckily Meijer right next door had some stuff, but barely. I also looked for boots, and there was NOTHING but spiderman boots...I'm saving those for when he realizes he has a choice.

I've looked at EVERY FREAKING STORE for boots, and they're all gone! One snow, and there are NO BOOTS to be found in toddler sizes anywhere within a 60 mile radius. I found some today at Payless, the last two pairs decent looking boots in either of the kids' sizes, so I snatched them up...the lady said they had JUST come in, and they were almost gone! I'm sure they won't fit their little Flintstone feet and I'll be back to square one. The guy at Penny's wasn't sure they were even going to get another shipment of boots. It has snowed one time, and they've already stopped sending the boots.

So next year, the kids are getting boots, hats, mittens, snow pants and coats in AUGUST. But I still refuse to put up my Christmas tree till after Thanksgiving. So there, retailers.

only a dollar for all this fun???

Chappie found some wax lips for cheap at the gas station...a good time was had by all. Anna doesnt have enough teeth to hold one in, but she tried!

Thanksgiving

So Chappie got a turkey from work and suggested we do Thanksgiving. For everybody. I told him I have never even cooked a whole chicken, so maybe I should have a couple practice runs first...meaning at some point (NOT Thanksgiving) we could make the turkey here.

He told his sister we're going to have our own Thanksgiving here! So now, not only do I have to cook, but I feel totally antisocial and I hope they don't think it was MY idea. He said we could go over later...but they're having dinner at three and there's no way I'm eating that early if I'm cooking it.

Speaking of...why do we have to eat at a weird time just because it's a holiday? I never cared before I had kids, but 3 is right in the middle of Anna's nap and I don't think she wants to get up to eat a huge meal in the middle of the afternoon. At least it's better than MIL...we eat at NOON there! NOON! Who can eat all that at noon?

Anyway. So we have an almost 13 pound turkey for four people...one of whom won't eat ANY turkey and the other who may eat an ounce or two. I stocked up on freezer bags.

Perspective

I've been having a hard time with staying at home lately...I've just been feeling nuts. But then I thought, well, it sure beats the hell out of doing packets, now doesn't it. So now my new mantra is "no packets no packets no packets" whenever the kids are driving me insane.

I think my head may explode

I have a test Friday over NINE CHAPTERS. Very information filled chapters, about the spinal cord, brain, senses, etc etc etc. I KNOW I should have tried harder to retain the info as I went along, but when you have a test more than a month after the last one, you get a little lazy.

PLUS, I think it's a little (ok a lot) excessive for me to have to know what every area in the brain does when I'm just going to be doing ULTRASOUNDS, for Pete's sake! I don't even really need to know where the brain is!!!

Plus, Anna is starting a sleeping strike...hopefully it's just teeth, because she's been such a good sleeper from 6 months old till now. She'll usually go 9pm to 8am, but last night she was up till 11 and woke up at 6:30, so 3 1/2 hours LESS sleep than usual. I'm surprised she's even in a halfway decent mood.

So anyway. If you're wondering where I am, I'm picking up the pieces of my brain from my desk.

The sweetest thing....

I love when my kids fall asleep with an animal or doll. I think it is one of my favorite things, to go in and see them sleeping with a stuffed dog or naked baby under their arm.

Men and sports

I can see why guys like sports. The cameraderie, the competion, the need to dominate and destroy-or at least watch somebody else dominate and destroy. I can even enjoy a good hockey or football game now and then. But there are some things I just don't get. Namely:

• They can remember the stats from the last 30 Superbowls but cannot remember what kind of butter to get at the store...when it's WRITTEN DOWN for them.
• They can grasp the intricacies of 8 different sports and their rules...but cannot grasp the simple process of turning their clothes right side out before they put them in the hamper.
• They know the names of the players for every team in the NHL, but cannot remember the name of your cousin, who you speak of and to regularly.
• Their team can be ahead by 100 points and there is no way the other team will come back, but they'll still get pissed if you suggest turning the channel when there are still 2 minutes left in the game.
• They can talk to some guy they don't even know about the basketball game for two hours, but their wives can't manage to get two minutes of conversation about anything.
  
• Baseball. I just don't get baseball at all.
  

Call CPS

I took the kids grocery shopping this afternoon. My first mistake. After I had to remove Anna from the car cart because she started pushing on Seth with her head (she has a good future as a battering ram), Seth said he had to go pee. So I say, "ok, they have big potties here" because he likes to know this ahead of time and will sometimes choose to wait. He said he didn't have to go after all. And then commences with this injured puppy noise. FOR THE ENTIRE TIME I'M SHOPPING. (all the while Anna is pissed because I took her out of the car, so she's not happy, either). I ask him 50 times if he has to go pee, and he says NO! By the time we get to check out, he's all out crying and everyone is looking at me like I just pinched him or something. He said he didn't want to go there!!! I can't be held responsible. So we paid and I left our cart full of (paid for) groceries sitting there and made him go to the bathroom. The minute I got his pants down he was going. Poor kid.